Sober Toolbox 8: Sober Super Heroes
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Photo Credit: Steve Halama. @steve3p_0
Hello Sobertown,
One of the beautiful things about us is the incredible diversity of our natures our beliefs and our backgrounds. Through this diversity though there is something shared between all of us, we all have people we look up to in our lives, we all have people we respect, many of us have people we idolise and we mirror aspects of their lives in our own or at least we aspire to do so. These people can be close to us, a family member or a friend. These people can be complete strangers, an actor, a musician or a famous personality you will likely never meet. Regardless of their accessibility to you directly, these people and what they stand for, who they are and how they live their lives mean something to you.
The people we respect deeply do have an influence on our lives, more than we know.
Although us sober folk are not necessarily the majority in our countries, you will be surprised at just how many of those around us are walking or trying to walk the sober path. You might not even know it. Understanding that we do indeed have a strong and numerous tribe can help to reinforce the meaning of our journey through sobriety and furthermore, seeing our idols walking this same path and living this same experience is a strong method of placating our wandering and heightened mind when it flounders from the path we have chosen.
Finding people you idolise or at least simply respect who are living an alcohol free life is a fantastic tool. While the commoner may have you questioning your choices when it comes to living alcohol free it is highly valuable to be able to divert any waning confidence in your decision to your own sober heroes, the second somebody questions your choice you can circle back to famous personality or local personality you respect deeply who lives a sober life or that super successful professional who assigns their success to avoiding substances and you will gain confidence. They do it, my heroes do it every day, I would rather follow them than you (ignorant person questioning your choice). One positive to the current level of tech in our lives is that we can gain a deeper insight into the lives of many prominent figures who may have remained a mystery a mere decade ago, it is becoming the norm to be open, honest and truthful about struggles after the fact and there are so many well known personalities who so deeply and openly share their past or current struggles, just fantastic to see. You my friends, can gain from this openness.
Do you have a sober hero? Have you thought about this? Have you googled famous teetotallers or sober celebrities? I bet you have, and if you have not, give it a go? I bet there is somebody you deeply respect who lives life sober and you may have had no clue!
I have a few sober superheroes and when I start to question my choice or somebody externally questions my choice, sometimes I go to these people in my mind. These are my heroes, I consider them good and I consider them role models. These people and their opinion mean multitudes more than any individual who disagrees with my life choice. Here are a few of mine.
My Sister: My sis never took to drinking, just doesn’t do it. Never struggled with it but still, she lives life sober and she generally kicks butt day to day. She was always an enigma in this and I always respected her deeply for her choice, whether she made it with great intent or whether she simply happened to be this way does not matter. My sis is my sober hero. When somebody has me questioning my choice I sometimes think to her and in my mind I find solace by realising “Cass lives without alcohol” she kicks butt and I respect her a whole lot more than this person, and I am immediately back on track.
My Sober crew: Our core group within our Sobertown community. I look to all of you and your strength, conviction and achievements. You do it every day and you do it your way, I respect you deeply so I can do it with you and alongside you, this is another reason finding your groups and connecting is important. When an addict loop begins in my mind I can divert my thoughts back to the Sobertown crew and know they are living this way and they are kicking ass too, addict loop cancelled.
Osher Gunsberg: Osher, the Australian TV personality and host can be credited with my initial realisation and investigation into potentially shifting to a sober life through his openness in his discussions and his writing about addiction and mental health struggles. Some of the shows you host are terrible but you do it bloody well and thank you Osher from the bottom of my heart, thank you.
Devin Townsend is a metal artist and producer from Canada, his music has shaped my life and changed me, his openness about his past and struggles with alcohol, marijuana and other substances speaks volumes to me. I love you Devin, your music may not be every persons cup of tea but I absolutely adore you and your mind, no artist will ever live up to you in my life and the diversity in your music pre and post sobriety only adds to the experience. When a craving comes to my mind I realise Devin is making incredible music and living sober every day, craving gone.
Christina Ricci: Love her, sober.
Anthony Hopkins, need I say more? I mean seriously, it’s Anthony Hopkins. Right? Sober.
Daniel Radcliffe, Harry Potter himself. Sober.
Ewan McGregor is a legend of film and life and I love his acting abilities and his sense of adventure. Sober
James Randi, the stage magician and scientific sceptic who passed away after a long and full life in 2020. Randi is a hero of mine. He lived a long and wonderful life Sober.
I could go on and on. I have many sober super heroes. Enough about my sober heroes, mine are not relevant I describe them to outline the tool only and I added them to show you how I found and use the tool myself. I draw so much strength and conviction for my decision to live alcohol free when I know that many of my idols have chosen that path. How could Hopkins be wrong? How could my sis be wrong? How could Sobertown be wrong? They all do it, I am proud to live in the same way they do. The answer is that they are not wrong at all, the short term and fleeting irrational circuitry firing in your mind is what is wrong and your sober heroes can wrangle those irrational gibberish thoughts, shirtfront them and tell them just how off base they are when they try to tell you your heroes are all wrong and you should drink. Some of these heroes you may find through your own research have done it tough, just as tough as you or I and they likely had to fight their way to sobriety too. Take solace in this, I certainly do. Nobody is immune and the best of the best also choose this life in many cases.
If you have somebody questioning you, which might be in turn having you questioning yourself, ask yourself what have they achieved? Look to one or several of your sober role models and then ask yourself, who do you respect more? Who do you aspire to be more? Does the sober or non drinking role model you have in mind mean more to you than the individual questioning you. Can you draw the irrational thought of drinking back to logic and realise that actually, MANY of the best of the best choose to live their life free of alcohol. Are they all wrong? No chance Sobertown.
Search for Sober Celebrities, Sober Musicians, Sober Athletes, Sober Artists.
Find your sober heroes. Musicians, authors, athletes, actors and actresses, influencers, regular life average joes whom you respect and love. Write them down, delve deeper into their lives and their reasons for living a life without alcohol. Follow their lead.
I will not include a list in this article, there are PLENTY around for you to find, I encourage you to do so. Keep looking, us sober people are swimming amongst the crowd, you can just about sniff us out, but not quite. Search for those among your groups who live sober, search for those sober super hero’s in your life and talk to them.
The Tool is this
When a craving comes around, or you think you might crack, think to yourself, what would (insert sober role model) do. The answer is they would NOT drink and they are awesome for it.
Do what they do. Do not drink.
If you find yourself questioning your choice, or you are questioned by others, draw back to your heroes. They don’t drink and you respect them greatly, so take their lead and dismiss the voice of addiction, dismiss the nay Sayers.
Simple right? Maybe not but it is one many strategies that help.
The Sobertown Blog articles and recordings are created as a means of assisting others in achieving and maintaining freedom from alcohol. Experiences, entries, research and article content are that of the author/s and should be applied in a safe manner, where/when relevant, with medical oversight. This is not medical advice.
